anti personality in disorder

See you may think that I am a bitch with a face thats always looking serious i never have a smile im forever frowing but what I see is a woman who is tired from years of torment and abuse who is sick of being mistreated and used if i walk around like i hate you then it wont be hard for you to figure out that i dont want you to intertwine yourself in my web of bullshit and lies that i created to keep myself out of the way because just like everyone else you are only in my life to hurt me mentaly i am drained i wish everyday these feeelings would go away i hate being frustated sad stressed and lonely but i love my solitude the feeling is my only joy sometimes in this fucked up world my identity is unknown even to me i cant tell you how many times a day i split into another version of my complex personality happiness is a feeling i dont know the meaning of but from this point on it is a feeling that i want to never stop im just an antisocial butterfly who is about to clip her wings